Thursday, October 13, 2011

Oh the stuff I could collect…

If you followed me to this blog from my old one, you probably remember that I have a relative that likes to bring us… stuff!

To be honest, I’m not really sure why he brings us this stuff.  My theory is that he is a hoarder.  Actually, I KNOW he is a hoarder but not the kind you see on TV.  Not the ones with the mold growing and the ‘stuff’ thrown about like it’s a landfill.  Not that kind of hoarder.

He’s a much tidier hoarder. 

The kind of hoarder with organized stacks of newspapers, junk mail, shoe boxes, napkins from this restaurant and that, hubcaps found on the side of the road (he would turn them in for cash), scraps of paper… just in case, etc.  I don’t think he would ever consider himself a hoarder at all and please know that we really do care for this family member.  This is just one of those things that must be documented.  Even he laughs at the stuff he brings us sometimes.

I think he must decide that if this ‘stuff’ is not usable to him, it must be usable to someone.  He must think of me as Someone. 

The goods always show up in a cardboard Nike shoe box.  And there are always little tiny ‘goods’ too.  However, I am not allowed to keep said Nike shoe box. 

All the goods must be transferred to my own box… though the kitchen counter serves this purpose just as well. 

We’ve received everything from Snapple lids (yes, the lids… about a hundred of them altogether), hotel napkins (most from Las Vegas), paper coasters (also from Vegas) and the like to a watch face (just the face), broken McDonald’s toys, and broken cell phones, and pieces of 2- 5 inch ribbon (all found in parking lots or street gutters). 

And sometimes, there is actually something useful in there.


Anthony and I thought about making a ‘JUNK collage’ on our wall downstairs.  Would have been fun but hmmm, no! 

I JUST COULDN’T HANDLE IT ANY LONGER!!  I’ve got enough ‘stuff’ as it is. 

We settled for pictures instead. 

Last night’s collection of crap stuff looked a little something like this:


Actually, it looked exactly like that.  Only it started out in a Nike shoe box.  Wasn’t that nice of him to bring us a late night snack from McDonald’s? 

Let’s take a closer look…

  • Pom-pom – found while he was running on a high school track.  It has fiber-optics but sadly, doesn’t work.  “The girls can play with it.” 


  • Movie passes – something we can actually use!  Hooray!


  • Hat, glow stick necklaces (old ones… they no longer glow), a brochure, and mechanical pencils (also found on the track at the high school where he runs)


  • And now for my very favorite!  Our late night snack turned out to be a sack full of ketchup packets.  43 to be exact.  I counted just for fun.  We got a good chuckle out of that one. 


It’s always fun to see what treasures the beloved Nike box will provide.  Like I said, lots of junk (aka garbage) but every once in a while there’s something worth keeping. 

I’ve tried telling him that we just don’t need that stuff but he continues to bring it anyway.  I’m at a loss.  What can I do?  I just have to laugh. 

Do you have ‘gift-bearer’ in your family? 



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